Now, I keep hearing that the reason all of these Jihadists are so inclined on blowing themselves up is for God's ultimate reward of 72 Virgins. Now if Muslims actually believed this, there would be (a hell of a lot) more than the 40 or so suicide bombers in a year...for the love of God, there are over a Billion Muslims.
These remarkably short life spanned chaps do it, because they are unhinged, they are morons and figure if they are going to kill themselves, they may as well get some credit for it....and say God said it was OK, so they're peeps can be proud of them and tell everyone there is a 'Welcome to Heaven' halo on their heads. Needless to say, their mental faculties are compromised (or mis-wired). But this whole concept brought a new line of questioning to my mind....
Q1. Who is the complete cluster fucking idiot who thought that seventy two virgins?
It's from an unreliable guy, who heard it from a guy, who heard from a guy, who claimed that the Prophet said it, completely unverified and the guy has a spotty record/memory. A bunch of the sayings he attributed to Prophet Muhammad have already been disproved.....including this one.
Q2. How did it become the epitome of God's greatest reward?
If this imbecile is somehow still alive someone ought to take a loaded pistol, shove it up his ass, and keep pulling the trigger (remember to take the safety off!) till you hear the gun click......reload and repeat exercises. If the sewage spewing mind molester is dead, then I'm sure God's got me covered.
I have no idea beyond this. I refuse to conduct research as I believe all knowledge gathering outside of the Quran is a western conspiracy designed to cloud our pure Islamic minds.
Ever wonder why there are so few Jihadist suicide bombers? It's very simple. It's evolution. Only the most stupid human being would think that it's a blessing to have to live and appease 72 chicks, hence, they are the morons who get to die (preferably before passing on their genes). To prove it, Islam allowed 4 wives.
Now find me a single suicide bomber who has more than a single wife (that isn't clinically insane.... which would actually explain a lot).
Women are highly complex mind altering creatures, and the truth is that being with just one of them will cause cancer, ulcers, brain hemorrhaging, and that's before your married (if you want proof, check out Bridezillas). Now do yourself a favour and multiply that by the power of 72.
Every man, with half a brain (or old enough to experience a relationship), has considered this, and has swiftly passed out from the potential trauma (this is why men like taking naps...we have long recovery periods). It's a completely stupid idea.
Can imagine all the girl drama? Typical groups of girls (5-6) are bad enough, but I can't imagine what 72 virgins will do to a man psyche. Chatter, Chatter, Chatter....and you'll be the one 'impartial' mediator....Good Luck playing Daddy and Husband with the same horde of women all day (If your into that sort of thing, I doubt your in Gods goods books anyway).
How do you explain how you love them all equally....to 72 women!!! Be careful or they'll string you up and tear you open like a pinata, although that's what you deserve for wanting such a ludicrous thing.
Since women are the ones with the power in any relationship (it's a fact, check wikipedia), they are the ones who get to decide who gets the lucky martyr for the night....and how exactly do they do that amicably? Rock Paper Scissors?
Forget friendly pillow fights, think more Jail house brawls. That's a dangerous collection of estrogen (a Class A felony drug if there was any), and your the only guy, but the end of your first week you'll be looking into Sex Change operations.
Whilst one may currently be praying for 72 Virgins now, once you get them, you'll be praying for Viagra....not to mention a shot gun to blow your own brains out.
Q3. Is this Logical?
My Logic is impeccable, if you don't believe me, check out my formula.
Step 1. Martyrdom = Seventy Two Virgins = Freaking Nightmare
Step 2. Martyrdom = Something only a Moron who hates his life pursues
Step 3. Something only a Moron who hates his life pursues = Seventy Two Virgins
The Big Idea
Life is hard, living the life of a good person (let alone Muslim) is hard.
The truth is that we all, in some way or the other, come short.
To kill yourself and others in the name of religion is a cop out, and one that God isn't likely to fall for.
Instead, why don't you (Cluster Fucking) Martyrs, try Living for Islam and bettering the world around you.
Even if you fail, at least you won't harm anyone and hey, you might do some Actual Good.